The Strategic Retreat

Why I Hate You, My Cat

Posted on: by Zervas

my cat

I hate my cat. A cynic would observe that I hate all cats and that’s fair. From toxoplasma gondii to their scratchy little claws, cats piss me right off. But I’m not here today to talk about cats in general, I’m here to talk about my cat; Tangeray. And that’s a perfect place to start, cat. I hate your name. What kind of white-trash drunken child names their cat after a brand of gin? Even worse, who misspells said brand of gin in the naming? I guess you and Oprah could hang out but misspelled names don’t cut… Read the rest

Throwdown: Britney v. Michael

Posted on: by Zervas

Britney V. Michael

It’s the age old question, who would you rather have babysit your children; Michael Jackson or Britney Spears? Unlike the Chicken v. Egg debate (Egg clearly wins) this question presents me with a bit of a problem, for the first time in my life I’m not immediately sure of an answer. I will present the facts, as I see them, and let you decide.

Will they drop your kid?

baby drop
Brit: Not only does she not know how to hold a kid, she doesn’t notice/care that he’s falling.
MJ: He made one mistake in this regard, he… Read the rest

10 Celebrities Who Should Have Died Young

Posted on: by Zervas

Some people overstay their welcome. Like the house guest thats great for the first few days but eventually drinks all the beer and won’t get off your couch, some celebrities just stick around too long. Whether they become drunks, failures, criminals, perverts or worst of all; George Lucases (Luci?), later actions ruin their legacy. Below are the top 10 celebrities who could have been remembered fondly, if only they left in the year suggested.

10. Orson Welles: 1942

sd-orson.jpg

What he was: The 20-something writer, director, producer and star of “Citizen Kane”.

What he became: An Read the rest

Exercise, The Slow Killer

Posted on: by Zervas

two-girls-exercising-cayucos-beach2

For the past month or so I’ve been going to the gym. I lift on Monday and Friday, with 30 minutes on the elliptical Tuesday-Thursday. On the way home from the gym yesterday I got to thinking; I bet this is a waste of time. I’m now going to do the math to either confirm of disprove my hypotheses of “working out is for suckers.”

To begin my experiment I googled “exercise live longer“. The first article spoke of generalities so I moved on to Read the rest