The Strategic Retreat

Real

Adrian Peterson McDonald’s Hoax

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So, The Consumerist, Yahoo, Huffington Post, etc are running with this story involving Adrian Peterson. The story, as reported, goes like this: Woman let’s Adrian Peterson use the bathroom, at 3am, at the McDonald’s she assistant-manages from. She then, like a week later, got fired.

Here’s what happened, probably:

  1. This chick works at McDonalds.
  2. This chick blows off like a week of work.
  3. Chick shows up to work at McDonalds.
  4. Chick gets fired.
  5. Chick makes up a story.
  6. Local news reports the story.
  7. Chick gets her job back.
  8. National news reports the story.
  9. Chick loses her job again.

Terrorist Tries To Splode Me

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Pioneer Square Christmas Tree

So, I had mostly finished up an article about the TSA’s new search procedures, which I had planned on posting today. Yesterday a guy named Mohamed Mohamud allegedly attempted to set off a bomb at SW 6th and Yamhill, in Portland, at around 5:45.

Seeing as how I’m usually at SW 6th and Yamhill at 5:45 I’m putting off snide comments until I get back from Thanksgiving at my folks’ place. Cynical Zervas will return on Monday.

10 Reasons Why You’ll Hate Me

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Molly and Bela

As this website continues to develop you will eventually come to hate me. I’ve accepted this. Most people who don’t know me do indeed hate me. In real life I’m smart, charming, polite and generous but in real life people rarely address religion, politics or basically anything of consequence. This bothers me so I’ve strategically retreated to my own little world where such things can be discussed. And by “discussed” I mean, discussed by me with no feedback from you.

You may never learn to hate me but if you’re anything like most people you probably will. First off… Read the rest

The 3/5ths Fallacy

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usaOne of the last classes I took at university was Black Power. It was a pretty good class. I learned a lot about the roots of the black power movement, African history and present-day class struggles plus my professor wore a dashiki. Along with useful information I was also taught some crap; all white people are racist, black people cannot be racist and that once upon a time black people were considered 3/5ths of a person.

While I disagree with the belief that my skin color makes me racist I don’t feel like arguing that point. Mainly because it’s a… Read the rest