The Strategic Retreat

Why I hate you

Michael Phelps Is Not The Greatest Olympian Ever

Posted on: by Zervas

Michael Phelps by Marcopako cc license

Michael Phelps is not the greatest Olympian ever. Despite what The Guardian or Sports Illustrated brashly declared before the 2012 Olympics even ended he is very far from being “the greatest”. Unlike SI.com I don’t have the misguided hubris to state my opinion is “beyond debate”. Nothing is beyond debate so I will present to you 7 points as to why Michael Phelps isn’t the greatest Olympian.

1. Swimming is not a real sport.

That’s the crux of it all right there. Swimming is athletic, it is challenging, it’s even sporting in a way but it’s not… Read the rest

10 Reasons Why You’ll Hate Me

Posted on: by Zervas

Molly and Bela

As this website continues to develop you will eventually come to hate me. I’ve accepted this. Most people who don’t know me do indeed hate me. In real life I’m smart, charming, polite and generous but in real life people rarely address religion, politics or basically anything of consequence. This bothers me so I’ve strategically retreated to my own little world where such things can be discussed. And by “discussed” I mean, discussed by me with no feedback from you.

You may never learn to hate me but if you’re anything like most people you probably will. First off… Read the rest

Why I Hate You, My Cat

Posted on: by Zervas

my cat

I hate my cat. A cynic would observe that I hate all cats and that’s fair. From toxoplasma gondii to their scratchy little claws, cats piss me right off. But I’m not here today to talk about cats in general, I’m here to talk about my cat; Tangeray. And that’s a perfect place to start, cat. I hate your name. What kind of white-trash drunken child names their cat after a brand of gin? Even worse, who misspells said brand of gin in the naming? I guess you and Oprah could hang out but misspelled names don’t cut… Read the rest